The Price of Greatness

iPhone was launched in the States just hours ago. It has been widely hyped since it was previewed at the start of the year, as both a engineering marvel, and the skeptics, well, remained skeptical.

But the reviews have said it: it has its flaws, but it has changed how we interact with our phone.

But what's the price behind such a great product?

Like all other Apple products, there are always stories about the work there: late nights, sacrificing familiy time so that they can create one of the best products in the world. That's the price paid for producing great products.

------------------------------------------------
History is filled with great people. Newton, who is so involved in his work that he forgotten about his wedding. Benjamin Franklin, who nearly killed himself when he's doing some tests with the lightning to discover electricity. Shen Nong, one of the divine ancestors of the Chinese, who tried almost every single herb out there to see what is poisonous and what cures. Nai Luag, who gave up his private, quiet and carefree life in Switzerland to rein a country he hardly knew from collpase.

We glorify them. Newton, Benjamin Franklin, as one of the greatest scientist in the whole world. Shen Nong, was divinified as a great ancestors of the Chinese, just like the Yellow Emperor. Nai Luang, though he has no consitutional powers, but his words alone can set the direction for his people. Just last year, his people celebrated with joy and tears of 60 years under his reign. Apple Fans go crazy over Macworld and WWDC when Steve Jobs introduce new products.

But have we forgotten, the price they had paid?
--------------------------------------------------
Greatness are not borned. Geniuses are not borned, they are made. It's simply the shifting of all your bodily resources to accumulate at one niche, so that that particular niche will be great, at the expense of other niches, which is in deficit. It can be in the form of other talents, or health, loved ones, social life, etc.

Is it worth it? To sacrifice your health, personal life?

My answer: Is that what you sacrifice for the one that make you happy? That for all the hardwork you've put it, the miniscual success outputed enough to make you feel that its all worth it?

If so, why not then?

Who is to judge what is worth it or not for our lifes? If we don't think it is worth it, exit it. If we think it is, who cares about what other says about it?

In Loving Memory

Today, my black shoes just "died", or "chui-ed", as I'll call it. A huge chunk of the sole from the left shoe broke off.

Well, the soles were showing cracks for the past month. I just didn't expect it to "chui" so soon. Besides, it's extremely difficult for people of my feet size (around 13) to get shoes, when the largest shoe size most Singapore shoe shops carry is 12.

Anyway, I'm not doing a Lin-Dai-Yu-burrying-flowers here.

It's just that this the very pair of shoe followed me through some of the most significant events of my life for the past year.

I wore it when I was reliefing for the first time, my award presentation ceremony, all the way through the significant events in hall that I was involved in, till now - likely, the last time I'm reliefing at this place.

Guess it had closure even before me.

In loving memory, of the pair of black shoes that went through significant events of my life.

24 June 1985

Here's a story that happened 22 years ago.

One fine day, a lady was down with a very serious flu. She was given certain medications which she took, not knowing that she's pregnant.

A few weeks later, she found out that she's been pregnant with her third child for a month or so. However, it was no news to rejoice over. The flu medication, apperently, is known to cause side effects on foetuses. There is a high possiblity that the child may be born with a defect - mental, brain damage, or missing limb. There is even a chance that the defect is fatal to the child.

The lady was confused. She didn't know what to do. Should she keep this baby? Can she handle it, on top of her 2 sons?

She consulted the abbot of the temple. The abbot reminded her about karma. "If you've owed this baby due to what you've done in the previous life, and it is time for you to repay what you've done to it to end this cycle." Finally, she found the courage to keep this baby.

Yet, she cannot shake off the feeling that the baby may die right after his/her death. June 23, 1985. That is the baby's due date. The day went on without any event.

June 24, 1985. The baby was born.

"How's the baby? Is he ok?" Asked the lady.
"Don't worry. He's fine and healthy. He has a birthmark though." said the nurse.
"Over where? his face?" asked the lady, becoming more worried.
"No. But he has a heart shaped birthmark on his knee though".

True enough, there is. However, as the baby grows, the birthmark disappeared even before he could remember that he has it.
---------------------------------------------------------
Since last year, I've decided not to have birthday celebrations. True, I've become older. But what's there to celebrate? All the well wishes from friends and family, that's enough for me. The well wishes from the kids, well, they're an added bonus. Probably a simple dinner with those close to me is all I needed.

I don't want it be a day that is special because I'm born. I want it to be a day that is special because of the courage and love of my mother. Her courage to bring me to this world, with all the love she has, knowning very well that I could be a burden that's beyond what she could hold. I want it to be the day to remind myself that I've caused her pain and anxiety, even before I was born, and more so after I was born. But her love, never stop.

And I want it to be a day to remember, what love can bring. I want it to be a day to remind myself - I'm given these love so that I can love those around me, especially my friends and my kids.

Happy Day-I-put-you-through-hell-lot-of-pain-which-you-never-complained-about, mum.

Neo-nomad

Was reading this post from Tym's Blog and was intrigued by the term "Neo-nomad".

As CMD+C and CMD+V (copy and paste shortcuts on a Mac) from her blog, the defination of Neo-nomad is basically

"... people who turn a laptop, a wireless connection and a cafe into an office and work wherever they happen to be ... distinguishe[d] from traditional freelancers because of their close engagement with technology and use of the latest generation of web-based tools in their working lives."


Technically, my bad habit of working off my desk, then to the floor, then back to my desk(and the cycle goes on) is not considered to be "neo-nomad-ish". But thanks to my Mackie, NUS Wireless network, and now, Wireless@SG, I'm increasingly becoming a Neo-nomad.

Yes, I hate working at home. There is something about working at home that stems my thinking. Possibly because everything is too static, or possibly because I find myself subjected to "arrows" of errands from my other family members or stopping what I'm doing to pick up phone calls that 99.99% of the time doesn't look for me extremely distruptive to my work. In another words, I would always want to work elsewhere.

Being in a Neo-nomad in NUS is a dream. Electrical outlets are everywhere. And if you have an extension plug, people are more than willing to share the plug with you (sorry. Labelling pictures of multiple plugs in use at electrical outlets as "Dangerous" doesn't seem quite dangerous to us. Especially when your paper is due real soon). Needless to say, wireles coverage is pretty good as well.

In hall, everyone is a neo-nomad. Laptops are carried into meetings, be it in meeting rooms, lounge, dining hall, or someone else's room. There will always be someone with a laptop working somewhere other than his/her own room.

Lately, AMK library has been my latest Neo-nomading place. Good tables, barely used plugs, what more can I ask. The catch is the place is filled with invisible people - tables sprawled with books and notes, chairs with bags, outlets with adaptors, but not a single person is in sight. So you've gotta learn how to share space with these people. I usually use any unoccupied space of the table that is unsprawled and occupy any unoccupied seat. Adaptor without a laptop? I'll assume you've left your adaptor behind, and shall unplug it and coil it nicely for you.

Come to think of it, I wonder how these invisible people revise their work. They can dissapear for a whole hour, return for 10 minutes, and dissapear for another hour.

Another gripe of mine in AMK library- the Wireless@SG coverage there. Within one buiding, there is 2 different operators operating Wireless@SG. The network is kinda intermittent as well. So it's quite irritating when the network is down while you're searching for a picture to put in your slide, but up when you're not surfing.

What about cafes? I hate going to cafes. Not because of their over-priced food and drinks, but rather, the lack of electrical outlets.

So here I am - a uncaffinated neo-nomad

A sign of times?

From today's ST forum: Is there a shortage of school teachers?

My son, who is a primary 3 pupil, i sgoing through a tough time, with his teachers changing every single term, so much so that it is like a revolving door.

He had a Chinese teacher who taught for two terms and is now going for training at the National Institute of Education (NIE), so he will have a new NIE-trained teacher for Term 3.

He head a new English teacherin Term 2, and now we are expecting a "new" teacher for Term 3.

Why is there such a high turnover?

I raised my concern over the lack of continuity with the school, anad the explaination given was that there is a shortage of teachers.

I strongly support the theory that higher pay will atract better-qualified people. May I ask what the Ministry of Education(MOE) is doing about attracting top people for the very important job of cultivating our future generations?

I understand taht the economy is doing very well and people are less inclined to join the teaching profession. What is MOE doing to retain teachers and not lose the potentially good ones to the bette-paying private sectorr?

My two chilren have very good teachers. If only we could keep them...

Jenny Sim Siew Hwa (Mdm)


Just the other day, I received a call from X Secondary School, asking if I can relief them for term 3. I've only placed Geography as my teaching subject, and I assume they are lacking in Geography teachers. No one was(and will not) be posted in this year to replace my collegue who got posted out either.

What does this imply?

Personally don't think there is a shortage of teachers in general, but rather, a shortage of teachers for CERTAIN subjects, especially the languages and humanities. And I think this problem will persist for a long time to come, whether the economy is good or not.

Why?

Firslty, its harder for someone to qualify to be a Humanities teacher. If you were to check the degree requirements MOE has set for teaching subjects, to teach English Language at a secondary school level or above, you need an Arts Degree. For humanities, an Arts Degree is not enough. You need to major in the discipline to teach that subject. However, most of the other degrees allow you to teach Mathematics and Sciences at a secondary school level. In another words, there is a higher chance that a mid-career switcher, or a person who've decided to join the force right after university, to qualify as a maths and/or science teacher.

Next, at least according to what I think, most Singaporeans think that an Arts Degree is useless, and would prefer a Science or applied science degree, thinking that that will gurantee them a job. I wouldn't dispute whether this is true or not, but judging from such mentality, we would expect a higher proportion of graduates having non-Arts Degree. Of course, that means there is even lesser people who qualify to be Humanities or Language teacher.

It might be argued that the Faculty of Arts and Social Sciences is one of the larger faculties in NUS. However, how many of them are interested in teaching? One of the most popular majors is actually economics - and apperently, base on the interactions of my peers who majored in economics, most choose it as it is "easier to profit from it" or "to find a job with it", especially in the finances and banking sector. Geography is a rather popular major as well, but base on the number of geography majors I've encountered, less than 50% have intentions to be teacher or are on the way to be a teacher. The other greater than 50% prefer to work in the private sector, especially tourism related activities. In fact, Geographical Information System (GIS) is apprently rather popular - similarly, due to its widespread application in the private sector, hence guranteeing a job, rather than out of passion. That being said, imagine the situation for our literature companions.

In another words, even if the economy were to get worse, driving more people to go into teaching as its the only few jobs available, I wouldn't expect the shortage of humanities and language teacher to improve. Perhaps just a little, but not much. I don't blame MOE for setting such strict requirements. After all, I would want my child to be taught by someone who has sufficient curriculum depth. Also, after I've entered NUS, I've realised that there are so much more I've learn in my modules that I could bring into the classroom to add interest, depth and breadth to the lesson. Yes, I agree that such requirements are neccessary, even if there is a shortage of humanities teachers. Then again, having a arts degree, majoring in a humanities subject wouldn't gurantee a good teacher.

I think the parent brought up 2 very good questions: Why the high turnover, and why the shortage of supply? I've tackled the shortage of supply, but what about the high turnover? Is it a sign of the situation of the service? Consequently, is the lack of interest in teaching a sign of the situation as well?

I guess enough teacher-bloggers have brought up situations in schools. But is that the reason?

I don't know.

But i'm more interested in the following. If my memory serves me well, the birth rate has been decreasing since 1987. Shouldn't we expect less students? True, foreign students may be contributing to the numbers, but I don't think it is big enough to compensate for the fall in birth rate. So techincally, speaking, the turnover rate is higher than the fall in birth rate?

Well, it's just my wild, limited scope of observation and thoughts. Don't take it seriously.

choosing the right path

7 years ago, when I was at the age of my kids, some people(IT instructors, seniors, juniors, peers and teachers) saw my potential in graphics and multimedia. They told me this "Wah, looks like you no need to worry about your rice bowl in the future. Can go into designing!"

I told them about my dream career since young: teaching. They would tell me "kinda wasted. Why not teach these stuff?"

Then I struggled. Shall I go into designing, which I seem to be good at, or shall I go into teaching? After reflecting for a few days, I've realised that I hate being bounded to my desk, staring at the screen for hours designing. True, it's a great hobby. But as a job? I think i'll hate it. After all, creativity isn't something that I can gurantee all the time - who knows how many sub-standard websites I'll produce due to a lack of creativity at any point in time?

Today, I've realised how tired I am of designing things for organisations. I used to have a sense of satisfaction seeing the finished product of a website. But then, I realise, what's the big deal about it? It's just for the image of the organisation. Something that's good to have, but not really neccessary. After all, image is so temporal, it can be changed anytime within a few months. Doesn't help when there are different kinds of browsers out there using different rendering engine, which means that I have to ensure that what looks good on this browser will work for the other browser. How nice if the engineers of these browsers know the kind of problems they're causing and unneccessary codes that has to be added just for the website to work.

Don't get me wrong. I don't hate designing. I still like it as a hobby. But I just hate designing things for organisations now. I'm sick about coaxing people from the organisation to be sure what they want to communicate to those seeing their website, when for most of the time, these people don't know what the hell they want from the website! Seems like to them, a website is something they "must have", but they don't know what are they going to have it for. Kinda like the Hello Kitty soft toys that McDonalds used to give - everyone thinks its a "must have", but don't know "what for".

I'm sick of asking them to change their way of thinking and writing, and that the web is a totally different medium requiring a different form of writing. Yet, they insist on their ways that has great damage to the user friendliness and the purpose of the website.

I'm sick of not feeling anymore sense of satisfaction after finishing a website for an organisation. Yes, people may say "wah, it looks good!" or "great job!". But I can't help but to see how much new skills I could have picked up but didn't. I've always wanted to learn Actionscript for Flash since the time I've learnt Flash, but never got to really pick it up. And now, it has advanced so far ahead. Now with AJAX, PHP, it seems like the web can do so much more, and I'm still stuck with static websites, and the newest technology I've ever employed is just CSS.

I've wanted a break from designing in hall. True, it elevated my status in hall during my first year. But I want to try something new. Yet, I can't. I can't get my designing break, and I'm increasingly tired of myself being far behind the possiblities of the web. I'm tired of myself churning out the same designs over and over again. True, it may have wowed people. But it didn't wow me.

I'm grateful for having these design skills. After all, it's these skills that allow me to make slides that wow my classmates and teachers for that extra mark in presentation. After all, it's these skills that allow me to wow my lecturer and tutorial mates for the extra marks my group can get. After all, it's these skills that allow me to make slides that are easy to comprehend and look good.

But I'm sick of designing for organisations. After these few websites, I'll stop.

I've found a much more satisfying and purposeful use for my design skills - education.

I don't need to have fancy background or flashy animations. Simple fading in and out, tweening etc is enough to create an animation that allow the students appreciate the formation of a feature much better. Slightly less effort, yet something much more purposeful and satisfying.

I don't need to illustrate colourful pictures, yet, simple black and white diagrams are enough to help them understand a process so much better.

I'm thankful that I have these skills - it allows me to make notes that are clearer, more presentable, with better and clearer diagrams. Especially useful for someone who teaches geography.

Though it's less fanciful that creating website, I find it more purposeful and satisfying.

After all, a good diagram or animation can help a student understand a concept in 5s, as compared to explaining it in words in 5 minutes.
A good sets of notes that is clear can help a student understand and better revise in 5 mins, as compared to ploughing through unneccessary words for 15 mins.

Nothing is more satisfying than helping someone understand something better and faster. And with these design skills, I've found a much more purposeful and satisfying use to it.

a period of doldrums that was uplifted immediately

had a arguement with a really close relative over the phone yesterday.

Just when the conversation ended, and I was trying to get over it, one of the kids MSNed me.

kid: "mr l, I saw someone at ***point today"
me: "who?"
kid: "adam chen! He's so handsome in person!!"
me: "-_-"
kid: "really!"
me: "yah whatever"

I can't help but laugh.

Oh I'll miss these kind of stuff, when I'm no longer part of their memory eventually.

But that's the facts of life, aren't it.

mac os x leopard

was watching the Steve-note (Steve Jobs keynote) at Wordwide Developers' Conference 2007 (WWDC).

I love this part

"now, we've got a basic version for $129.
We've got the Premium Verison for $129
We've got the Business Version for $129
The Enterprise Version for $129
Ultimate Version, we're throwing everything into it, for $129

We think everyone will buy the Ultimate version. Seriously, there is only 1 version"

Not quite true, but there is also the Mac OS X Leopard Server Edition.

But home users, surely "Server Edition" means that it is not for us right? (as compared to premium, business, enterprise.....)

What a lampoon at Windows Vista. I love my Mac for its straigtforwardness and simplicity.

A much needed break at last

thanks to some of the kids, had a much needed DOTA break today. I'm sucky at it already - haven't playing it for 1 month makes me even suckier (is there such a word?)

anyway, one thing I like about playing with them is that, no one takes it seriously. No one takes dying, winning or losing seriously. It's just a game, and the whole idea is to have fun.

Indeed, we had.

back home, back home

went back home (the one in Thailand),
came back home (the one in Singapore).

it's been 7 years.