another death

stumbled upon one of my kid's new classmate's (a transfer student) blog. the first line of his post made my heart sank. it said "i hate my father. period"

i would love to tell him to appreciate his father more. but he doesn't know me, why would he listen to me preach.

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they say that friends have a lot in common. but there are some things you wouldn't want your friends to have in common with you, especially sad things.

the last thing i want to have in common with my friends is losing our father, especially at our age. sadly, for the past 8 years, 3 of my friends have this similar experience, with varying impacts. one is the "in-between" sibling. another, is the youngest. another, is the eldest, and took up the role of both a brother, father and head of the household. 3 of us had the fortune among the misfortune, to be mentally prepared of the death. one of my friend, had to face changes that occurred literally over-night.

2 days ago, i received the news, that a secondary school friend of mine has joined this "club". her father had committed suicide due to depression. the news hit hard - we didn't know how to approach the topic when we attended the wake. but she was her usual self - strong and bubbly. but beneath it, the amount of pain, the question "why it happened", is something i myself can't understand i think.
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i used to think that way before. i hated my father, i wished he was dead etc. especially the times when he meted out punishments. till the very day i know i might lose him, i regretted thinking that way.

i hope that kid will learn and realise, before he starts to regret.